Soft Hearts, Hard Feet

Jackie Pullinger once said ‘God wants us to have soft hearts and hard feet. The trouble with so many of us is that we have hard hearts and soft feet.’

What the heck does that even mean or look like?! I didn’t realise I had a hard heart, I thought my heart was pretty soft; I occasionally gave money to charity, volunteered, went to church every week and had even gone on a mission trip with my church. I thought I was doing pretty well! It was only when I went to Hong Kong in 2014 for 9 months that I realised that I in fact had a hard heart. I was living in Hong Kong with St. Stephen’s Society[1]- a community, family and ministry that exists to love men and women, introduce them to Jesus and set them free from addiction through the encounter of His love. Essentially what I was doing there was living in community with these men, who are called brothers, living each day with them, worshipping, eating, studying the Bible, playing sport and doing a bit of art here and there. It was family.

A few weeks into my time in Hong Kong I realised that I really needed a heart transplant, so to speak, and I prayed a somewhat dangerous prayer- dangerous in the sense of what was to follow! I said to Jesus, ‘I want you to give me your heart and I want you to break my heart for the things that break yours’. And oh my goodness did he break my heart! I started to see each of the brothers how He saw them, and started to truly love them. When I heard some of their stories my heart broke and oh boy did it hurt! I remember hearing one of the brother’s stories of his childhood, how he was abused as a baby and a child by his own parents, how they tied him up and beat him each day, and how he lived not knowing that he was loved so deeply. When I listened to his story my heart was in pieces, I was hurting- not just out of sympathy or empathy, but it was as if God was replacing my heart with His, and breaking my heart for the injustice that is present all around us. Ezekiel 36:26 says: ‘I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh’. We can’t change our own hearts, we need to instead allow God to come and give us a new heart. A heart that is shape-able, soft and ready to listen to Him and receive from Him. As Jesus softened my heart he was also healing me and transforming me. And by no means is that done and dusted now! My heart becomes continually hardened by pride, selfishness, sin. Daily we each need to come back to Jesus and be in continual relationship with him.

To me, a soft heart looks like a heart committed to Jesus and to His will; a heart that is quick to forgive; a heart that is full of His love and compassion.

Now onto the feet! Often in summer you’ll find me barefoot, whether that’s exploring the beach, running around on a farm or just being too darn lazy to put on a pair of trainers. After a while of walking on the harder terrain my soles become tougher and more resilient so I am able to walk more easily over sharp stones and gravel. You can probably see where this is going… As we step out with Jesus and follow him to the uncomfortable, rocky places He has called us to, our spiritual feet grow harder and more resilient so they can carry us further, to rockier and seemingly uninviting places. Walking with Jesus isn’t easy-breezy, it’s pretty challenging, with trials and really quite tough times, but we have His promise that He will guide us through them, toughening up the soles of our feet and preparing us for what else He has. As we follow Him and trust Him, the soles of our souls will grow tougher and become more prepared and ready to be used by Him.

When I reflect on my time in Hong Kong, I see now that God was hardening my feet, leading me to places where I was challenged and had to rely on him. It wasn’t comfortable, it wasn’t a year of all fun and games. There were tough and painful times in which I was pushed to grow and put my trust in Him. I was challenged to rely on Jesus each day and trust Him where He was leading me and guiding me. Now here in Exeter I see him hardening my feet but in different ways, with new challenges and struggles. Each day it’s a choice to follow Him in that day, to be obedient to His will for that day and be shaped by Him in that day. I often have moments in which I realise that my spiritual feet have softened up again and I have become comfortable and complacent in my faith. It’s in those moment I have to re-commit myself to Jesus and to His will, and step out again in obedience to where He is asking me to go and what He is asking me to do.

Isaiah 52:7 says ‘How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of those who bring good news’. Beautiful feet aren’t newly pedicured or polished feet, they’re not feet with the sweetest kicks on, but they are feet that travel, that are worn and weathered. Beautiful feet are feet that bring His Good News. I want to challenge you (and challenge myself!) to ask yourself ‘What do my spiritual feet look like?’. Let’s not wait until we leave university, go abroad or are in ‘the real world’ to ask God to soften our hearts and harden our feet. I want to challenge you to ask Him today to give you a soft heart and hard feet and be prepared for what He will do in and through you.

I don’t know about you, but I want to have the softest heart and the hardest feet, ready to hear God, be shaped by Him, and follow Him wherever He wants to lead me.

[1] http://www.ststephenssociety.com